Develop the ability to be with anything – Life is unpredictable and change is guaranteed. One moment you have the perfect job, found the one, established yourself financially. Then that company gets restructured rendering you unemployed, your sweetheart leaves you, or has a tragic accident, your wealth is lost with the crash of the stock market or a poor real estate investment. Resisting life creates struggle around that which is inevitable, and there is a certain level of insanity to resisting what is. There is great value in developing the ability to be with life as it happens, you don’t have to like it, just be able to accept it. Find that still place inside of you that experiences calm independent of what is going on around you
Ruminating - We have all had devastating experiences. People promised to be there and disappeared in moments of crisis, when we needed them most. A friend or loved one dies unexpectedly. Opportunities that would have made our life had they only played out like they were meant to, if only…. When something unfair happens, or, someone wrongs us, many of us relive that bad memory allowing it to consume us, making it part of our identity. The issue then becomes how we think about what happened, not what happened. So what’s worse? The moment you experienced when you lost something, someone; or the fact that you have chosen to relive it in your mind every day since. A person or unexpected event can impact you once, ruminating on it can impact you forever. Know that choosing unpleasant memories is now you hurting you. Let go, look to the future and acknowledge you deserve happiness.
Be careful who you listen to and what you believe – People speak from their own experiences, opinions and beliefs – so be careful what you ‘deem’ to be true. Many give up on their goals when told something is not probable. At an audition, age 39, Lucille Ball was told not only could she not act, but that she was painful to watch. Less than two years later she had her own show. Had she accepted that producers opinion, chances are she would have thrown in the towel and the world would have been deprived one extraordinary comedian. Become conscious of what you accept into your mind as truth. Is it fact, or opinion? If it is fact, can the facts be change? It was a fact that space travel was not possible when JFK declared he would put a man on the moon, however, he changed the facts when he gathered a team of scientists to created the metal to withstand re-entry thus making space travel possible.
Stay connected – Research indicates, one of the greater determinates of happiness is a strong social network. Being surrounded by people who care and who want to share our experiences gives our life meaning. Recently my friend Roman and I had been texting one another our Bucket Lists. We had scheduled a call to talk about our goals, at that time I was struggling with completing some edits from my book; His response, stop procrastinating I want to know a bestselling author! This brief conversation, where I shared what was going on for me, shifted me from being stuck to experiencing gratitude for Roman’s friendship and encouragement. After a few laughs, I hung up the phone newly inspired, as did he. Stay connected with friends no matter how busy you may be.
A Busy Mind is a Happy Mind – Keep yourself occupied with projects that inspired you. Consider the purpose of life is a purpose. Whether it’s raising happy healthy children and being a role model as a parent or building a holistic company that brings balance to the world, purpose is essential to happiness. Overcome the urge to get distracted with petite little grievances and maintain the perspective of the larger picture. Stay active and focused on contributing to people in your life and community.
Don’t wait for inspiration or motivation! - Exercise becomes easier once we book the trip to the sunny location and know we are limited for time to shape up! There will be times when a situation, person or event leaves us inspired and propels us to action or change. Truth of the matter is that chances are you will experience more moment when you struggle to find motivation. Develop the discipline to act anyway you are much more likely to become inspired when you are in action. Action can inspire motivation so get on whatever it is that you need to address until you re-connect with your momentum. Procrastinating just prolongs an unproductive mental state and creates more dissatisfaction. Do what it takes to do to stay in action. You could ask a friend to hold you accountable for deadlines, hire a personal coach or trainer. You can create penalties to keep yourself on track – I once offered to pay an employee $100.00 per hour, for every hour I was late with article submissions. You can bet I was on time!
Stop being so significant – We can get very significant about things going on in our lives to the point where we deplete all joy. These are what I call excuses for unhappiness most of us have them. Presence yourself to reality – there are people all over the world dealing with REAL problems. There are children starving, people dealing with earthquakes and natural disaster who have lost loved ones and everything they have worked for their whole lives. It doesn’t mean you don’t have things to be concerned with, but if you have people who love you and are there to support you and listen, you have a lot. Be grateful for all you DO have.
Tags: challenges, change, depressed, fun, happiness, happy, how to, overcome, positive thinking, robin h-c, stress, tips
